RSS

The Winter of My Discontent

09 Mar

Burnout

The last time I posted an article on this blog was November 6th.  Up until then, I’d posted about 1,900 articles–about one every day and a half for a number of years.  It’s hard work trying to find something to say that’s (hopefully) new, worthwhile, insightful and still not too long.  I was, to some extent, exhausted.  Burnt out.

It wasn’t just burn-out from the writing.  I love writing.  Not because I love telling my ideas to others.  That’s good, but it’s not my primary motivation.  I love writing because it teaches me.  I don’t seek to teach by writing.  I (mostly) seek to learn by writing.

If some idea strikes me as kinda interesting, normally, that idea would go in one ear and quickly out the other to be quickly forgotten as merely a kind of curiosity.  But, if I write about that obscure idea, all of a sudden I begin to see the idea in greater depth.  I begin to see things that were not initially apparent.  Writing slows my thought process down and makes me think about things rather than quickly dismiss them as trivialities.  The process of writing makes me think, makes me see, makes me learn.

I love it.  My life is no picnic, but I consider myself hugely blessed by circumstances that allow me to write for a living.  I’m not a rich writer.  I’m not a great writer.  But I am a writer.  I’m not just proud of that.  I’m grateful to the Good LORD.

I saw a report in the 1990s that claimed there were only about 1,000 people in the whole country who could support themselves as independent writers.  There might be hundreds of thousands or even millions of Americans who write for a living as employees of corporations, ad agencies or government departments.  But according that report, there were only about 1,000 self-employed writers who could support themselves in the entire country.  I’m one of those 1,000.  I’m proud of that.  Grateful.

My status as one of those “chosen 1,000” has more to do with my willingness to live on next to nothing than my ability as a writer.  Still, I’m one of those 1,000–or by now, maybe that number is 2,000 or 10,000 independent, self-employed writers.  No matter.  I’m still proud and grateful to be able to support myself by writing.

But writing is hard work.  I doubt that many people realize how stressful it is to keep trying to writing articles that show some new idea, insight or perspective.  Every day.  Every week.  For years.  It’s hard work.

Trying to write something almost every day that is: 1) insightful; and 2) hopefully, doesn’t waste readers’ time is challenging.  It’s fascinating.  Educational (for me).  But it’s not just an adventure, it’s also a job.

Plus, I’m no spring chicken.  I’ll be 72 next month and I’m grateful for the health I still have.  But I don’t have the same health and energy I had just 10 years ago.  20 years ago, I could and did work 100 hours a week.  Had to.  I was going broke.  I wasn’t smart enough to know what to do, so, all I did was overpower my problem with long hours.  It worked.  Nearly killed me.  I had chest pains and tingling down both arms.  I don’t know what those symptoms meant, but I assumed they signaled an imminent heart problem.  I kept working.  I figured I could work up to 110 hours a week before I croaked, so, working only 100 hours per week gave me a 10-hour margin for error.

Eventually, I hired some help.  Cut my hours back to a mere 80 hours a week.  I felt as revitalized as if I was on vacation.

But, those days are gone.  Twenty years ago, I could work 100 hours a week.  Today, I doubt that I can work more than 40 hours a week.  You get older and your body starts to slow down.

But that was only part of the reason I stopped posting articles on this blog for four months.

The biggest reason was the Trump election.

I was exhausted after the election was decided.  I’ve never before been emotionally invested in an election.  This time, however, the threat of Hillary winning left me frantic.

During the election, I didn’t realize or even suspect how deeply obsessed I was by the election.  I was for Trump, big time.

But I was even more against Hillary.  The idea that that woman could be elected President scared me.  If she had been elected, I would probably have seen it as a sign from the Good LORD that He had written this country completely off.  I did not view Hillary’s potential election as an ordinary candidacy.  I saw it as a possible curse and a judgment from God.

I talked about Hillary on my radio shows.  But I didn’t write about her or Trump to any degree that might seem obsessive.  However, only after the election was decided did I figuratively collapsed from exhaustion.  It was at that point that I first realized how deeply involved I’d become in the election.  I felt like  a man who’d just crossed the finish line in a marathon race.  I needed to lie down.

After the election, I stopped co-hosting my radio show for a week.  I stopped writing my blog.  I thought I’d get back to the blog in a few days–but, instead, it took me four months to start writing this, my next post.  I really needed the time off.

Then There’s the Leg

About 2 months ago, I walked over to the grocery store about a half mile away.  I hadn’t been getting much exercise and both of my legs “locked up” with some serious pain.  My left leg “healed” in just an hour or two, but my right calf was too sore for me to walk on for a couple of weeks.  There was a cord running down the center of my right calf that was as thick as my thumb that healed very, very slowly.  I don’t know what it was.  Maybe a sprain.  Maybe some irritation between the muscle and sheath in my calf.  Some people thought maybe I had some sort of clot in my leg’s veins.

It’s only this last week that my right calf was finally strong enough and sufficiently pain-free for me to try walking back over to the grocery store.  This time, no problems.

But the message is clear.  I have to exercise more often.  I like to exercise, but I hate to take time off from writing or reading to work out.  I love that writing, but it’s not healthy work.  You can’t sit on your butt all day and expect to live to be 100.

There’s a Woman

Nothing romantic.  I’m too old for that.  Besides she’s 150 miles away.

But she’s having some legal problems and she’s had some remarkable success as a pro se.  I give her a little advice from time to time.  Sometimes she even takes it.  Mostly she rejects it.  Very hard-headed.

Nevertheless, we talk a lot over the phone.  I’ll bet we talk at least 30 hours a week.  It’s almost a full-time job talking to her.  But I enjoy it.  She reminds me of me.  Our seemingly endless conversations, and movies once in a while, and Bible study on Friday nights, may be the biggest real reason I haven’t gotten back to the blog for the past four months.

I’m kinda like Gerald Ford in that regard:  I can’t talk and post articles at the same time.

Return of the Watchman?

I was recently arguing with a friend over a biblical issue and I brought up the concept of the “watchman on the wall” found in Ezekiel (if I recall correctly).  According to the Bible, if the watchman sees the enemy coming and warns the people and they ignore his warning, their blood will be on their own heads.  But if the watchman sees the enemy coming and fails to warn the people, their blood will be charged to his (the watchman’s) account.

 Right or wrong, I’ve thought of myself as a “watchman” for the past 26 years.  I’m not trying to flatter myself.  I’m just telling you that that’s how I’ve thought since about A.D. 1990.   But I’d kind of forgotten that job description and that job’s obligations until my recent biblical debate.  

 Now, I’m reminded that I can’t abandon my watchman job without being held accountable for the injuries to those who I might’ve otherwise warned.

 Therefore, I now have reason to pack a lunch, “climb back up on the wall” and keep my eyes peeled to “sound the alarms” with articles on this blog.

 I’ve been absent for this Winter of My Discontent.  Some of you have written to ask if I was OK.  I am and I appreciate your concern.

 Now it’s Springtime (at least hear on Texas) and time for me to get back to work.

 Thanks for waiting.

Advertisements
 
41 Comments

Posted by on March 9, 2017 in Personal

 

41 responses to “The Winter of My Discontent

  1. Bob

    March 9, 2017 at 2:19 PM

    Welcome back, Shep (as in shepard of the flock).

     
    • Adask

      March 9, 2017 at 2:22 PM

      Thanks.

       
  2. Jay

    March 9, 2017 at 2:27 PM

    Welcome back, Al! I always look forward to your blog posts, and have been a listener of your show since day one.

     
  3. David Sautter

    March 9, 2017 at 2:38 PM

    Hey, Alfred…Yer still a young pup, though it’s revelatory when I speak of how long I’ve enjoyed your thoughtful articles since the days of “Anti-Shyster”. I’m now 73, and feel like 20. I always had this penchant for digging in to verify what most took for granted…and was never one to easily or readily trust as expected. I feared for this country under Bush Senior and things only worsened since and as with you, I could not countenance the idea of another four years of a banker’s proxy and shill by passively tolerating the likes of sapphic HRC. Thank God for Trump! The battle is getting nastier now, and we’re in for a long fight to restore this country. Keep up your fine work and know that you’re not a lone voice in the wilderness.
    David Sautter
    Salinas, California

     
  4. walterallenthompson

    March 9, 2017 at 2:48 PM

    Hi Al,

    Good job with the exception that the word Writter on the photo should be writer. LOL Maybe you should take another break.

     
    • Adask

      March 9, 2017 at 2:55 PM

      The word “Writter” was a joke that was included in the graphic.

       
  5. Frank

    March 9, 2017 at 3:58 PM

    It’s great to have you back Al !!

     
  6. Melva Vallery

    March 9, 2017 at 5:54 PM

    Hello! I do enjoy your blog and knowledge! You gave me some encouragement as a pro se litigant in my copyright infringement lawsuit against American Girl/ Mattel, which is still going on.

    Not a Trump fan nor Hillary …

    Happy you’re in a great relationship, a bit hard to find companionship at our baby boomers ‘ age.

    Glad you’re feeling well …

     
  7. R Medrano

    March 9, 2017 at 6:02 PM

    Get well ,
    Welcome home,
    You’ve been missed

     
  8. cynthia

    March 9, 2017 at 6:39 PM

    I am confused,I thought that if one is truly a godly man then they are not a part or party to any “… body politic ..” much less “… body politic and corporate…” rather under what could be called original commandments without the edits or changes by man.. I certainly need to study and research them yet specific to “voting” it seems silly because every single “vote count” has been proven not on rigged and or fraud in various aspects and multiple locations but the ‘electors’ are the decision makers, not needing to go by majority vote, rather independents.

     
  9. Sybren van der Pol

    March 9, 2017 at 7:13 PM

    Al glad to see you are (well) Get out and enjoy Gods creation more so you can keep going. The 90’s are a long time ago.
    You have many insights to the world so keep writing.

     
  10. wholy1

    March 9, 2017 at 7:23 PM

    Yo Al, great to see you “back in the [at least] ‘writter’ saddle” – lady withstanding?? Hope yer packing “heat” along with that lunch, considering these increasingly dicey times. Eager to see if “palani” will again bless us witH his/her interesting “eruditions”. Your contribution to the fundamental understanding of those that are “man OR other animal” as opposed to those that understand his/her very unique/special manifestation IN to this world but not OF it as Men/wo[mb]Men made in the image of the almighty AUTHOR will forever be etched in my memory/heart. THANK YOU!

     
  11. Judson M

    March 9, 2017 at 7:37 PM

    Every body needs a rest from time to time! I’ve crashed and burned from a few jobs I’ve had over the years. Worked long hours with 4 hours sleep for a while, worked to keep a business going only to find out later that it had been sabotaged from with in. It was devastating paying bills to help keep it going, then being one of the power leaders in it, I made the decision when it came that time go into debt or close. I chose to close it! Quite a devastating loss to me! Its taken me a decade or more to get over the emotional loss where it no lounger is painful and I feel deep down the loss. I can live again now.
    I spent 4 1/2 years, the last part of the Vietnam war training under one of the top Korean Tiger Dev., instructors. Thouse years I hope have helped me still have some quality of life still today. Still I haven’t really had the motivation to exercise hard, just work until a couple years ago- past the retirement age. A few months I will hit the 70 mark my self.
    We still have a lot of things like WiKileaks to search out and expose, this is part of our game, the reason we are here in this planet at this time. Others are doing there thing along this line in there own way. Its nice to have you back with us and helping as well! Yes, I really need to exercise too!
    By the way I go to that same store you go to from time to time. Sunday night its the Starbucks on occasion’s.

     
  12. LC in Texas

    March 9, 2017 at 7:55 PM

    Glad to hear from you again and to know you are alright.

     
  13. David Baugh

    March 9, 2017 at 8:12 PM

    Hi Al, was wondering about you. Thanks for the update. Glad to hear that you are still alive and kicking! Hey, I’m 73 and except for my leg injuries, I am vibrant and healthy! Why? Because I do not spend much time sitting and stay physically active and eat wholesome natural foods primarily. I refer you to Dr. Mercola at http://www.mercola.com to help you stay healthy. I have been using the supplements and following his excellent health advice for several years. By the way, he is a patriot too! Best wishes Al!

    Your Friend and fellow patriot,

    Dave Baugh

     
  14. R.D. Ennis

    March 9, 2017 at 8:34 PM

    I was wondering just the other day why I was no longer receiving your posts….I thought maybe I inadvertently “unsubscribed” or something. I understand the burn out thing and it was always an aggravation to get back on track after a bout with it. But I am now 66 and burn out is no longer an issue in my life….finally figured out how to avoid it or at least situations that lead to it. Welcome back.

     
  15. Stan Ohneck

    March 9, 2017 at 8:58 PM

    Alfred, we are so thankful you are getting back to your observation post. We missed your writings and perspective more than you can imagine. Personally, i have learned so much as so many others have, as well. It’s ok if you slow down …I have learned how to download your radio program on my semi-smart phone, so I can sort of “learn-on-demand” anytime I want! May God continue to bless you …and your readers as well. “Hoosier Daddy, piguy”

     
  16. cathy baldwin

    March 9, 2017 at 10:32 PM

    What a wonderful surprise this evening. I did write you this winter and therefore was aware you were taking time away, it still was just great to see a mail from you, like a present! The age thing is kind of premature maybe, you are still young at heart it seems. Plus, the election has given many a new and lighter outlook. I realized after it was over the low level of depression that I felt the last eight years. It really does seem like an act of God that we have this President, seriously. Love you.

     
  17. spirit in passing

    March 10, 2017 at 8:15 AM

    Good to see you’re back. In my opinion, however, you’d do yourself a huge favor by giving up the Lucky Strikes (does your grocery store still sell those?)

     
    • Adask

      March 10, 2017 at 9:13 AM

      I haven’t had a cigarette or an alcoholic beverage in nearly 40 years. Where’d you get the idea I smoked Lucky Strikes?

       
      • spirit in passing

        March 25, 2017 at 6:58 AM

        The picture of your “writting” area at the beginning of this post. Were Luckies your brand…40 years ago?

         
  18. RICHARD

    March 10, 2017 at 11:45 AM

    ALL THE BEST AL–FROM–75 YEAR OLD–AND–ON THE MORNING OF MY 70 B’DAY, AND 9 MONTHS AFTER A SERIOUS CANCER OPERATION–I SUMMITED MT. KILIMANJARO—SO–LIFE GOES ON PAST 70–YOU JUST HAVE TO MAKE IT HAPPEN!!! RICHARD

     
  19. Bill Connolly

    March 10, 2017 at 12:03 PM

    I am very thankful for your shared post. I too watched for your return.

     
  20. William H Keen

    March 10, 2017 at 2:32 PM

    Hey Al. It is good to hear that you are getting better. I always worried about your tasking. I do hope that you can find a really good ‘neutral’ area that lets you write AND exercise judiciously. Take care. Bill

     
  21. Gavilan

    March 10, 2017 at 3:37 PM

    Al, thank you for coming back. I found your writing back on the Antishyster News Magazine, followed you as best as I could from the days without internet.

    I fought the system’s corruption based on some of your writing, they beat me up, but I was always let go. I know the state and county officials know about me, and they fear I may cause some steer anytime they pull me into municipal court.

    Unlike you, I am not a gifted writer, as you can read I can barely stitch together a few words.

    The point is this, from your knowledge, I have been able to live a good life with limited government intervention, other people in the community have been able to live a life with limited government extortion from what I brought to light that prevented their corruption from becoming endemic.

    Now, there are others that are pushing the envelop and achieving success, I thank the Lord for that and pray the Holy Spirit keeps guiding them.

    Coming from me though, I give thanks and praise the Lord put your writing in my path, gave me hope and inspiration, courage and determination to keep those running the system from totally undermining the Republic where I abode.

    Thank you, hope you feel better, and that the good Lord continue to bless you.

     
    • Adask

      March 11, 2017 at 7:43 AM

      Thank you, and thanks to everyone else who commented on this article, for the kind words. I really didn’t think there’d be so many positive comments. I didn’t expect anything at all. I just posted my article. But I’m delighted to hear that I’ve made a positive difference in your life and in the lives of others. That’s what I’ve always been trying to do since I first started the AntiShyster back in A.D. 1990.

      However, over the years, I haven’t had much feedback to support my hope to be making a difference. I didn’t expect much positive comment and I didn’t get much. I wasn’t writing for praise. I was just sounding the alarm when I thought I saw something suspicious on the horizon. Just doin’ my job. Still, it’s always good to hear that I’ve made a positive difference in some people’s lives. Who knows? Maybe the Good LORD will yet describe me as a “good and faithful servant”.

      Thanks again.

       
  22. Ken Murray

    March 10, 2017 at 5:39 PM

    So glad you are still feisty and “with us”, so to speak. I am a “lurker”. Reading your posts and the responses to them. This is the first time, I believe, I have posted on your site. I was curious as to your absence. I would pop in, from time to time, to see if you shared something new. I had figured that a man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do, so I wasn’t all that worried about the dearth of activity. I do wish you well and much good health, physical, emotional and mental.

     
  23. Lyndon

    March 10, 2017 at 8:48 PM

    Huh! Had us worried there for bit! Easy man -take it easy! Glad to read you’re back at it. Kept checking this blog almost every day for renewals. You’re one of the first (if not the first?) political and law exposers i started with more than 10 years ago. You may not like it, but you’re up there with Karl, Dean, Marc, Angela, Peter, among many others. Thanks so much for keeping watch for so long; you’re time is plenty.

     
  24. Paul M

    March 11, 2017 at 10:17 AM

    Yes there are many ideas and positions in politics, religion or in health, and I enjoy the various takes you have on each. I find inspiration and puzzlement in your writings. I ask that you continue to post whatever you are thinking about as one will never know which article will spur an interest.

     
  25. Ron J

    March 11, 2017 at 11:28 AM

    Welcome back! Enjoy your writing and glad your fine and appreciate that there will be more posts along with the articles I will read in the future! RJ

     
  26. Howard R Music

    March 12, 2017 at 10:17 AM

    Can’t keep a good man down.

     
  27. Bill H

    March 12, 2017 at 2:31 PM

    Hi Alfred, I hail from Canada and as such some may think that your insights don’t apply, but I think that the base of laws in both our countrys comes from old and new English law. I look forward to reading more of your thoughts. I am glad to hear you are Ok, keep up the good work.

    Bill H

     
  28. americafirst1

    March 12, 2017 at 10:39 PM

    Al…….great to see you’re back in the saddle again & even better was having a chance to chat a little bit at the recent ‘Furrs Summit’. Not sure what subjects you’re contemplating but perhaps a story about the young couple we all discussed & the issues they’re facing would be quite interesting as well as instructive.

    Wayne

     
  29. Bob

    March 13, 2017 at 12:26 PM

    Shep, please explain “I am writter” to this moron !

     
    • Adask

      March 14, 2017 at 11:19 AM

      When you write “Shep” do you mean “Shepherd”? Or is that a reference to the Three Stooges?

      (In other words, sometimes this blog has it’s little jokes.)

       
  30. dog-move

    March 13, 2017 at 3:17 PM

    I’ll never stop wearing out your doorstep, for there is great insight there. A watchman you are at a time when there are few watchmen standing in the gap for the behalf of the many tribes assembled here.

    Standing in the Gap:

    “I looked for a man among them who would build up the wall and stand before Me in the gap on behalf of the land so I would not have to destroy it, but I found none.” – Ezekiel 22:30

    It is my belief that the Good Lord looks down from the vault of heaven, and sees you, and blesses you with the power of Holy Spirit and holds you up so you can continue to see Things and blow the trumpet of warning. Thanks Alfred.

     
  31. FL GIRL

    March 14, 2017 at 2:16 PM

    Hey Al:

    Missed ya! I was wondering what happened to you. I was scheming thru the bulk of emails I receive on a daily basis, and I just found your email today. Just some friendly advise, you need to stay on top of your health, and its a great topic to talk about too. I recently found out that the kidney problems can be related to “root canal” teeth. I had a root canal back in 2006, and about 4 years ago I started suffering from kidney stones, bladder stones, infections etc…. I never had any real health problems nor kidney stones to that extent. I started researching online to see if I could find any correlation to my health status, and there was Dr. Mercola telling people that root canal teeth are toxic on youtube. Not only Dr. Mercola, but tons of reputable holistic doctors telling the truth. It seems by design that our medical and dental practices in this country are not to aid us, but to “slow kill us.”

    I took Dr. Mercola’s advise and had that root canal tooth pulled, and I feel so much better. I haven’t been back to the Urologist to do any check ups to confirm my kidney functions, but I don’t feel sick as I did. The whole issue on the subject, is what medical procedure would allow a dead object to stay in your body??? A root canal tooth is dead, since it receives no blood supply, and can only spread bad bacteria throughout your body over a period of time.

    You said you need something to write about, look up Dr. Susan Humphries on youtube, watch a couple of her videos on Vitamin C. So many natural simple solutions have been suppressed from public knowledge.

    Not only that, have you heard of the Mandela Effect? Its a theory related to Cern, and time manipulation. Anthony Patch has some good insight on the subject of Cern. Watch some of the those youtube videos, it will blow your mind. It even has Biblical facts that have been changed, and can’t be disputed including the Father’s Prayer. The word “trespasses is now debts.” Its subtle changes in everything around us. Its not translation or updates, you have to watch some of those videos and read various Bibles to see what I’m saying. Have you ever heard of Unicorns referenced in the Bible? Not me, but its in there now, and words and terms in use today are now found in there like the word “tire” but its effects are long stretching from physical changes of the human body, land masses, movies, commercials, grocery products in the stores, etc… Just go to youtube and type in “Mandela Effect” or Mandela Effect on the Bible, and tell me if something isn’t right. Also, on youtube, “Watchmen Radio” has some interesting information on the subject as well.

    I recently read 1st Corinthians, Chapter 15, verse 52, and I have several Bibles, most of them reference a sudden change in a twinkling of an eye. What I found interesting is the word “Trump” is found in the authorized version of 1611, its not “Trump” in 3 of my Bibles, its “trumpet.” in the authorized version of 1611 its “Trump.” Its a clear distinction since the second sentence uses the word “trumpet.” Could this be a reference to our current president???

    The last person I think you need to watch on youtube and see some of his amazing discoveries is “Johnathan Kleck.” The things this man has uncovered is mind crushing. He has eyes to see, and he shows you where to look. It might just take an investigative reporter such as yourself to get your juices flowing again and see what you can uncover on these matters and let us know your thoughts.

    I know this might seem out of your normal line of political dialogue, but to me it all ties together in some way.

    Amazing times we’re in, what if we all went thru some sudden change, and didn’t realize it, maybe that could be your reason for your “Winter of Discontent”. You’re a different version of you….scary huh???

    Take care of yourself, looking forward to your next publication!

     
  32. GEORGE

    March 14, 2017 at 6:27 PM

    Alfred, glad your back , We were worried about you !

     
  33. Tuaca

    March 16, 2017 at 1:56 PM

    I am glad you are ready to come back /;-D I have enjoyed your writing for a long time and was wondering why you hadn’t written new articles. Relieved to see you up and running. Very happy you did not have ill health or traumatic injury!!!!

    I like your perspective because it makes me think a different way. You ARE educating me Mr. Adask!!!!

     
  34. ronfielder

    March 20, 2017 at 9:26 PM

    Consider the soleus muscle in your leg causing you some trouble. Without getting long-winded look up some vids on mobility in the lower leg. It can take some time to get relief but I think it will help you.

     
    • Adask

      March 21, 2017 at 12:19 PM

      I’ll take a look. Thanks.

       

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s